from ellen degneres' "the funny thing is..."

It's terrible when you forget what you're going to say after two words, but what's worse than that, really, is forgetting what you're going to say when you've been talking for a while. You know, like when you're at a dinner party and a whole group of people are talking, discussing some heavy subject matter, and you don't really have an opinion on it. Then suddenly you think you do, so you jump right in there to share your opinion, and you realize you've actually got a pretty good opinion to share! When your friends hear this opinion, they're going to be blown away by how smart you are. They had no idea that you were so smart, and they will be shocked and impressed that you would come up with such an interesting point of view. And you start congradulating yourself, and suddenly, since you're feeling so good and you're celebrating too soon, you completely forget the point you were going to make. And you're still talking. And they're looking at you like you don't know what you're talking about, and you don't, but you can't let them know that. So you just keep talking, praying that the point will come back to you. And not only does the point not come back, but now you've completely forgotten the subject everybody else was talking about. You really start sweating. You loosen your tie-- if you're a man or Diane Keaton or Avril Lavigne-- and then you try to jump out of it by saying any sort of generic statement that comes to mind. "Well, six of one, half dozen of the other. It's a slippery slope, my friend. Teach a man to fish. And you know, there's no 'I' in team...Is there any more Merlot?