At the upper deck II

At the upper deck, I tell Ankit its not my hat & be careful.

Back then,
we were looking for anything
we could get away with--connect four, pretzels,
pizza, fries,a car ride,
a finger puppet, a downtown movie theater,
anything we could fit
inside a backpack.
But as it turns out the bingo jokes
are mostly bad
and even if you do win its embarrassing.

In the hall today is a postcard, stamps,
unturned & then slipped over.
The space of a thumbtack
points out where the keys weren't put.

In between existing then and not then
existing now,
I get lost in the folds of my own skin.
I forget how to build even a sentence.
I wake up to find my legs are missing,
that my whole family went down to the North River
and drowned.
They'd forgotten how to swim.

And I notice my own legs are missing.
And I notice a weight in my hand.